Now that Justice Souter has announced his retirement, could President Obama possibly nominate 9th Circuit Judge (and former Clark County Assistant DA) Johnnie B. Rawlinson to fill his seat? MSNBC seems to think it is a possibility, as they have placed Rawlinson on their short list of possible replacements.If the President is going to fish in the 9th Circuit for this nomination, we would prefer that he cast his line a little more to the right and go with the real pick ... Bybee.
However, as we all know, this nominee is going to be chosen based upon what they have between their legs, not their ears. This anonymous commenter on the ATL post about Souter's replacement pretty much nailed it:
It is undeniable that a vagina is a primary qualification for the SCOTUS. That just makes sense. However, some women have a condition called didelphic uterus, which results in - wait for it - TWO vaginas.Please Note: We are in no way insinuating that Judge Rawlinson has two hoo-hoos ... just that it may help her chances of securing the nomination if she does.
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/woman/real_life/article344794.ece
Can you imagine the power of a two-vaginaed Justice? She would be undefeatable in the political correctness rock-paper-scissor calculations made in modern liberal thought, where her double barreled crotch shotgun would double not only her female qualifications, but perhaps even count as a physical disability. Can you imagine?! Better still, if we were able to find such a woman who was of a pre-approved minority (African-American, Hispanic, and/or Native American), her qualifications would stack up like some sort of fucking appointee Voltron.
I hereby petition Obama to divert all funds not previously diverted from National Defense into searching for such a candidate and, if possible, somehow wrestling her overpowered frame into a cage for shipment to the SCOTUS.
